I'm Bossy

Anyone that really knows me knows that I am bossy. I don't really have a problem with that. Instead of seeing it as a negative thing, I like to say that I like to take charge, and have things done my way. Which is usually the right way. I am surrounded by bossy women, whether it be family, co-workers, clients, whatever. Most of the time, I don't think of bossy women as anything to blink twice about. Until I am reminded that there are still chauvinistic bastards that can't handle a woman that takes charge.

Today, at an event I was in charge of, I corrected someone, and let them know the way that I wanted it to be done. The way that makes things more efficient. I joked that I wasn't taking any crap today, and while three of the dudes around me laughed and said "you tell us what you want done, and we've got it, " one said, quite sassily, "did you need me to get you some chocolate?"

That pissed me off. I hate the assumption that the reason I am being bossy is because I am PMSing. Not only is it not the case, but if it was... is that REALLY something you say to someone? And the kicker... it came from one of the bitchiest, whiniest, most negative people I get to spend time with.

Every once in awhile, when I get pushed into the "way back time machine," and get to deal with someone still living in 1975, I just have to laugh it off. Bitch about it first. But then laugh it off. Because at the end of the day, he gets to have sex with a frumpy wife. ;)

Things That Are Rad- Xmas at Target

I love Christmas. All the movies and music and decorations and love. Last Christmas (I gave you my heart) was a little bit stressful, and the first time in my 27 years when I said "Christmas sucks." It made me really sad. So, this year, I am getting BACK in the spirit!! I will be listening to the Christmas music FIRST thing Friday morning, and probably watching Elf later that day. I love smiling, smiling's my favorite!! Anyhow, I am taking awhile to get to the point of this post....

I went to Target after work today to get odds and ends (why are razor blades SO expensive), and I found THESE:

Yes, those are dish towels that look like SANTA!!! Two of them, for $4.99!!! Head out right now before all the crazies get them on Black Friday.

Speaking of Black Friday, I will be in bed. Asleep. Since most of my shopping is done. Are YOU going out and facing the crowds?

I'll be right baaaaack

So, let's forget the fact that I didn't blog for almost a month. I'm sorry.

After seeing Paranormal Activity this weekend, and STILL being creeped out by it while at work TODAY, I decided to lay out all my fears that have been caused by scary movies and stories. Mind you, I love scary movies. I am even the President of a, minorly inactive, Scary Movie Club. But, it still doesn't mean I don't get freaked out.

I have been debating on how to lay this out--- so let's go chronologically.

Growing up, we always watched horror movies. Loved them. I remember one summer night at about 7, my sister and I begged my dad to tell us a scary story. Can't really tell you the details, other than in the story, a monster grabbed the feet off of children that let their limbs hang off the bed. To this day, I keep all limbs ON the bed, and about 5 years ago was when I stopped JUMPING out of bed to avoid being grabbed. Thank you very much, Pop. I think that incident is why I HAVE to pull up my feet when I am scared. All of my neuroses can be traced back, I swear.

I think I can thank Child's Play for my fear of dolls. Well, that and the Twilight Zone episode with the ventriloquist dummy. Another set of films I can blame my dad for showing me. I remember being in bed the night my mom gave birth to my littlest sister, and seeing Chucky in my curtains. To this day, it freaks me out to put my back up against the driver seat ( I think he stabs someone through the seat in #2- YES, I went back for more).

I can't blame my dad for all of this. I brought a great deal on myself, reading all of the Fear Street books, as well as Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. The one that sticks with me the most was the "there's room for one more." I swear I may have linked it in a previous blog. Anyway, it is about 7 paragraphs long, so go for it. The basic story, is this guy has a dream where a man in a hearse drives up and says- "there's room for one more." The next day, the guy goes to get into a full elevator, and the SAME GUY from the dream says to him "there;s room for one more." He declines and, spoiler alert: the elevator plummets to the ground and kills everyone on board. I get on an elevator a minimum of 4 times a work day. I never get on when it is full, and i jump off if anyone says "there's room for one more. "

You know those kids that would say "bloody mary" or candyman into the mirror? Not me. Ever. Never ever ever. Because the Candyman makes me cry. Seriously, I cried during Final Destination because that scary fucker was the coroner. Anyway, I have convulsions when anyone around me even STARTS the Candyman chant. Note: this is not an open invitation to do this around me--- if you do, it is an open invitation for me to kick you in the balls/uterus. I am tougher than I was as a kid.

The scariest Steven King movie ever was the made for tv version of "The Shining." I know that it follows the book a LOT better than the Jack Nicholson movie. Of course, I can only guarantee that of the first 400 pages, because after two years of reading it- I am still not done, too scared. At least I keep it out of the freezer (15 pts to whomever gets the reference). Anyhow... because of that movie, I always open the shower curtain when I am scared. That way, I know that when I go into the bathroom at night, a partially decayed hag won't try to kiss me. Also- because of that movie, long hotel hallways CREEP me out.

I can blame the Scream series for a lot. Including my fear of looking into a backyard at night with a pool glowing (kinda sucks when you live in Phoenix), and my fear of large public restrooms. I am waiting for a killer to be hiding on a toilet, or in the next stall. Makes it really fun to go to the bathroom AT the movie theater around scary movie time. I also can't say that I will "be right back." Because---- what if I am just ASKING the killer to come for me?

Because of the movie Urban Legend, I have to check the backseat of my car 46 times before I get in. AND don't even get me started on the flip out that ensues if "Total Eclipse of the Heart" comes on.

I saw The Ring in college with a sorority sister. Four days later, we both got nose bleeds. We decided to go somewhere public on the 7th day, so that the creepy well girl would have to attack us with a large group around. Don't know what was more awkward, the fact that we ACTUALLY believed that was a good plan, or the fact that it was a kinda set up date with me and this kid I used to be in love with in HS. That movie also make it hard for me to go into any room where the tv is fuzzy, or the lights are flickering. Shortly after seeing the film, I was peeing in the back stall of the sorority house bathroom, and the lights started to flicker and the radio was losing reception... I nearly ran out with my panties around my ankles.

After Paranormal Activity, I will never again think "stupid a/c" when my roommate's bedroom door slams unexpectedly. I will now run out of the house thinking it is a demon. I'm not giving anything away, I promise. Also- the next time I wake up randomly at 2:43am, 3:15 am and again at 4:06 am..... I am gonna call in a demonologist. Also- go see it. It will be worth your $9.50.

Any recommendations on a film that will give me another crazy quirk?

memories... light the corner of my mind

This afternoon, I have been working on some of those boring tasks that you put at the bottom of the to-do list. Always a great way to spend a Friday afternoon. Keeps me out of trouble at least.

While working on these mundane tasks, I need to listen to music to keep me going. There is an album that I haven't listened to in pretty much forever: Plain White Tee's, Every Second Counts. The funny thing about it is that I cannot listen to this album without thinking about what was going on in my life at the time , and how different things are now- how much I learned about myself, etc. And that was just two years ago.

I have that kind of connection to music. I can't hear Johnny Mathis without smiling, imagining my Grandma singing incredibly off key but with all her heart. Can't hear "Drops of Jupiter" without thinking of sorority recruitment in college , and how much I loved all those girls. I hear "Don't Worry Be Happy," and think of the 1st grade field trip to the petroglyphs - my mom was a chaperon and drove us in the new van.

Sometimes I wonder what other people think of when they hear certain songs. Feel free to comment with any of your personal faves.

my secret soul mate

At the stage I am at right now in life, friends are getting married, having babies, being grown ups. But, I wonder if any one of them has the life partner that I do. He cheers me up when I am bored, remembers little things that I like, and can always guess what I am thinking/needing. He even sends me emails once a week proving his love for me. Who is he, you ask? Well... he is Stumble Upon . I know I have told you about him before, but today- he really warmed my heart.

Here are some of the links he sent me that he thought I would like:

Pretzels AND Peanut Butter AND Chocolate

Babies are manic depressive

So, I am not married, back off!

Coffee!

Booze on sale!

Oh yeah, well I invented superman.

Seriously?!! I mean, what a KEEPER!

Granted, my super cool boyfriend was the one that taught me the ways of Stumble Upon, and frequently sends me similar links through G-chat... so... I guess I can keep him around too. ;)

Hi, I'm Marissa, and I am a TWD addict

I love places like Digg . And Stumble Upon. Basically because I can find interesting stories and links faster than my friends, with minimal effort, because someone has already done the research (Digg). As for Stumple Upon, I can find these things by hitting a buttton, and just having something pop into my face based on my pre-selected areas of interest : liberal politics, beer, satire, cooking, lolcats, etc. Then, I just have to hit "I Like It!" in my browser toolbar, and IT SAVES THE PAGE FOR ME. Try it. It is amazing. I gave you the link to my page, so that you can see all the lame shit that makes me happy. :)

THIS , I "digg" as well. If I actually created an account on Digg, I would give it a "thumbs up." I am a a person that TWD's. In case you are irritated taht I haven't explained the acronym, or were too lazy to open the article, it stands for "texting while driving." GASP. Yes, I am one of those assholes. I atleat try to respons at lights.... most of the time. Anyhow- those that live in Arizona know that it is slightly illegal, but not necessarily punishable unless you were caught doing something else. Kinda similar to the license plate cover law. But people in Maryland are taking it pretty seriously, and it is a misdemeanor.

I know better. I do. And there are people that I yell at on their cell phones that aren't paying attention to the road... so I am slightly hypocritical. You can ask my sisters and my mother though... I am getting better. Basically because it is harder on the Blackberry, and I can't one hand type any more. ;)

All I have to do is dreammmmmm. Dream, Dream, Dream.

So, I have been having some pretty crazy dreams this past week. Let's look at last night's dream and analyze it. Here is what I remember...

I was on a bus. Not really sure where I was going. Anyhow, at some point, I decided that riding the bus was no longer the fastest way to get where I was going, and so I got off and started walking. I somehow met up with the graphic designer at work (really weird because as cool as she is, we don't hang out). Then, I was somehow at a hotel with my aunt and cousin and sisters. Then we were in a big white kitchen, making food to take with us on the trip. Then the other side of the family was in the kitchen. I think the order of things might be a little screwed up... but that is the just of it. So, I looked up some of the meanings at dreammoods.com. Here is what it said.

Trip
To dream that you are going on a trip, suggests that you are in need of a change of scenery.You are feeling overworked and need to take time out for yourself for some fun and relaxation.

Bus
To dream that you are riding a bus, implies that you are going along with the crowd. You are lacking originality and are taking no control over where your life is taking.

Hotel
To see a hotel in your dream, signifies a new state of mind or a shift in personal identity. You are undergoing some sort of transition and need to move away from your old habits and old way of thinking. You need to temporarily escape from your daily life.*Alternatively, the dream may imply a loss in your personal identity.

Kitchen
To see a kitchen in your dream, signifies your need for warmth and spiritual nourishment. It may also be symbolic of the nurturing mother or the way that you are caring for your loved ones.

Walking
To dream that you are walking with ease, signifies a slow, but steady progress toward your goals. You are moving through life in a confident manner. Consider your destination.


So, all I can say is.... wow.

I Need Ritalin

I have been so bogged down with meetings over the last few days, that I am effectively brain dead. Ooooh. Bad choice of words. Sorry Liam. :( Too soon... too soon.

So, in an effort to make me clear my head of randomness so that I can be productive, here are some thoughts, Larry King style.

- Simon Cowell is amazing. I think it is funny that the audience boos him when he is critical, but pisses themselves with excitement when he gives a compliment. I wish I had that power.

- Since my boyfriend and I live on opposite sides of town, we try to alternate homes each weekend. When people invite me to something on my side of town when it is his weekend, I am irritated.

- I hate the new facebook. I don't care if people post an "Easter Egg" on someone else's page. Now I can't delete it from my feed without deleting everything that person posts. Horse shit.

- I don't want to get fat feet and a fat(ter) ass when I am pregnant. Why are our bodies punished for bringing life into the universe?

- Why is no one talking about how that doctor shouldn't have put all those eggs in the octomom's basket? When did we forget that was insanity?

- I am usually more excited about March Madness. I think I still just miss Lute. But I think it is cool that we have a President that puts a bracket together, even if he has Arizona losing to Utah . Thank God he didn't put Duke to go all the way; I may have called my vote back.

- Why can't people just let Barack do his job? What ever happened to working together to figure things out? It was hilarious to me that people were afraid of him changing our political system so much, when he can barely get congress's approval for a bathroom break. People really need to educate themselves a little more, and stop listening to the talking heads who just say dumb shit for ratings. Whatever happened to the news?

- I volunteered to make dinner tonight. I still don't know what I am gonna make. It might be a game time decision at Fresh and Easy. That place is awesome.

- So, there is a guy that actually teaches a class on how to "look" busy at work. Can people not figure this out on their own?!?! It's called blogging. Get with the program. (I saw this on the news the other day- wish I had a link for you)

- I have to do something productive now... one last burst of energy at the end of the day.

Chipoooooodle

So, this is my second post about food. I really like food, and my hips can prove it. Today, since my roomie was taking a new yoga class, I was on my own for dinner. I was starving, and then I remembered that I had a coupon bag for a FREE burrito!! Thank you Sunday paper! Here is a little insight to my burrito order:

-I order the chicken fajita burrito. It comes with chicken, rice and fajita veggies. When they ask me if I want beans, I get irritated. It doesn't come with beans, thank you.
-Sometimes I get "just a little" rice. Usually when I feel chubby.
-I get the hot salsa. It is a red sauce that is better than the Qdoba sauce, because it is actually spicy.
-I get sour cream and "lots of rice." I am not afraid to ask for more cheese. Because cheese is awesome.
-Before I eat it, I roll it. As in... I take it while it is sill in the tin foil, and roll it like my hands are a rolling pin. Sometimes I roll it like rolling a bread stick in my hand. The point is to evenly distribute the salsa and the sour cream. I taught my sister this, and she taught her friends. It is now a phenomenon.
- After the roll, I take a bite and look at the distribution. Sometimes I have to shift the fold of the burrito, so that the bite is lined up in a more balanced way.
- I like to have my final bite contain a chunk of cheese. That way, my mouth is not as hot.

There was a couple in front of me today that had never been to Chipotle. They got the regular chicken burrito, with the mild and the corn salsa. They seemed upset that guacamole would be extra. Where do you ever go that guacamole is included? Anyhow- I wonder if they will be back. They came in with their free burrito bag too, so I guess it is fair to say that the Chipotle marketing team deserves a raise.

Random side note- I love Simon Cowell tonight.

I'm not really listening

I am becoming more like my father every day. I just don't really have the time/desire to listen to rambling stories. Even though I ramble myself.... Well, at least my stories are interesting. ;) Here are a few times that I can tell you, with about 95% certainty, that I am NOT listening:

- I walk into your office with a strict purpose, and you chose to discuss something totally unrelated, at length.

- Your story fails to get to a point... OR you have a point, but tell the story in such a monotonous way, that I can't tell when you are getting to the end of it... so that I can pretend like I was listening.

- If I have heard this story before.

- If I am watching television.

- If I am on facebook.

- If I am changing lanes on the freeway.

- If you have called, and I answer (knowing that sending you to voice mail is not an option)- immediately telling you that I am making dinner, in the bathroom, etc - and you chose to spend more than your allotted 45 seconds to tell me why you are calling.

- If I know that I will never be held accountable for remembering it.

- If I know that I am going to hear it again... either by just merely being present when you are telling someone else, or you forgetting you told me in the first place.


So, I am kind of a jerk like that. I don't find it irrational though, to ask of you to speak briefly, or at the very least, make it interesting. As someone who has a tendency to ramble, I have learned to "know my audience." I ask you to do the same.

;)