April 14, 2010

Idol Recap- Getting Rid of the Dead Weight

So- I am joining this program already 15 minutes in progress. I got really into Book Club and lost track of time. (NERD ALERT)

But- I am joining Andrew, singing his final song, and I am not so surprised. In his goodbye, Tim Urban is unknowingly stealing the scene. I say unknowingly because I really don't think that he is bright enough to be that manipulative. Roomie says the group sing was AWFUL, so glad I missed that too.

Oh, what was that? You asked what book I just read in Book Club that lead to the most conversation I think we may have ever had? Well, since Molly (btw- you are passed due for a blog, missy) and I are obsessed with true crime, and Chrissy likes to keep us happy, it was last month's theme. We read Mindhunter, which was written by the guy who basically created profiling. He tells stories about his interviews and studies with some of the most gruesome serial killers ever. Not really a light read, but so interesting and well written that we chat chat chatted. This is what you get to read about instead of the Idol Gives Back trip to Angola. But good for Kara for getting out there and getting involved.

Brooke, who I love a lot from last season, and some dude I never have heard of, and quite frankly, sucks are singing some song I have never heard of that the interwebs were trying to make seem like a big deal a few days ago. This guy thinks he is a vampire.

So, since it is 834, we get to find out who is in the bottom, and make them wait until the last 4 minutes. The bottom row is up- Lee Dewyze rambles. Siobhan stares weirdly. Katie Stephens looks frumpy, like she has already given up. Big mike looks like a ninja turtle. Sometimes I see people as animals, and that hat really brings it out in him. He gives a shout out tot he judges, who hope saving him wasn't in vein. The dirty hippie smiles with her 6 teeth. Tim Urban smiles, and the room brightens, even though he doesn't realize he isn't standing in the light. Crystal and Siobhan are safe. And Ryan creates this long drawn out business and has him sit. So the bottom are Tim, Katie and Big Mike.... who will turn into the incredible hulk if he is let go.

And now Adam can do whatever the hell he wants on the Idol stage without facing any criticism from Simon for being too showy. So he spends the first minute singing in green smoke. There is so much fog on the stage that it looks like he has no shins, and is just a floating torso. I hope they put up signs in the lobby that pregnant women and and those prone to seizures should be prepared for a fog filled laser lights show. Ryan talks to him, and Adam says that he owes Idol so much, because it prepared him for the ass kicking that the business gives you. Hear that kids? You think making 4 judges happy is tough? Try a marketing team, a record label, a management team, the media and the American public.

Ok, let's get this done. Tim Urban is safe. I fear for Katie's life if Big Mike gets angry. HAHA, American Idol was being tricky, and the one of the people there isn't even in the bottom three! Duh. Katie is out. Thanks for showing up, and thanks for not even bothering to try to put your appearance together. Why is she singing Let It Be? She is obviously crying, and it only brings out how crappily she handled this song. And Siobhan is crying again, because she is obviously best frineds with them all. Ugh, Katie, let this song be... and just go out gracefully please. I never thought I would be wishing for the for the cheesy montage. Ahhh. HERE it is.

April 13, 2010

Idol Recap- Whaddya Want From Me?

I am really excited about Idol tonight, because when it's over, GLEE is on.

I wonder(again) how much they spend in the lighting budget on the show. With my event production experience, I know that it is one of the cheaper ways to jazz something up- but seriously.

Kara is too dressed up compared to the other judges. At least it isn't sparkles this week. Ellen and Randy have decided they can BOTH wear vests, as long as one of them is sleeveless. Speaking of Ellen, I was a little geeked out when @TheEllenshow started following me on Twitter. I want you all to know that it will not sway my blogging, and if she says something stupid- I will still make fun. ;)

What?!?! Adam Lambert is the mentor for Elvis week? Where did I hear that it was for Queen week, or did I make that up? Is it because of the hair? Or is it the frequent use of glitter and glitz? Let's just hope he doesn't have the same obsession with fried banana and peanut butter sandwiches. Ahhh, Adam loves Elvis because he was a showman. He also acknowledges the fact that he is just beginning his career, so what does he know about mentoring. I am waiting for him to ----=omgomgomgomgomgomg Mr. Schuester is sitting right behind him!!!!!!---- come out with a Proactiv commercial. Shit, Katy Perry did it. Totally looks nothing like her in the commercial and it weirds me out every time. but. Ryan made some joke, and I totally missed it... I think it was borderline inappropriate.

The Dirty Hippie is singing "Saint," which I don't think I have ever heard. She is called "authentic" for the 8,352 time this season. Adam tells her to go electric and "let those dreads down." I hope bugs don't fall out. Randy thinks it was DOPE, and the second coming of Bonnie Raitt.... what? Ellen, instead of being repetitive, uses the time to say Happy Birthday to everyone in the audience. I know so many fricking Aries, it is ridiculous. They will be excited that they get the extra attention. Kara said something. Simon said it was original, blah blah. I really think I will just stop reviewing her. Wouldn't it be HI-Lar if everyone felt comfortable, and didn't vote for her--- and she was the bottom?? The judges have already used their "save." Yes, I'm dreaming. Yes, I have a thing against hippies that drives this thought.

Awkward Stool Time with Andrew. Damn, I thought they would have cut this to save time. He is reallllly boring. I though the tshirt/jeans/blazer combo peaked about 3 years ago... He is singing "Hound Dog," and Adam calls him out for being boring. Which he is. How has he made it this far? He's got the old school Elvis mic, and so far- it's boring. It sounds exactly the same as it did during rehearsal, when Adam said it was boring. Walking around the judges and towards the audience doesn't make it more interesting. Randy said it was "not good karaoke." Ellen wants more swagger, but he pulled it off. Kara thinks the mic was his crutch. Simon called it lazy, and it was the "part of the musical that no one wants to see or hear...." and "(his) coolness has been sucked out." So true. Ryan calls out that Ellen is the only one that liked it- apparently not understanding that SOMEONE has to fill the role of "the one that is always positive."

- took a twitter break, and found out the apparently the joke from Ryan involved tongues, and Brian Dunkleman. Somewhere, in his mother's basement, Dunkleman shoves another spoon full of Ben and Jerry's in his face. -

Tim is doing "I Can't Help Falling In Love With You." I think if he went with the UB-40 version, it would be gold. Adam says he should sing the end in the higher octave, like thoe Jonas Brothers do- because it makes little girls dial. Well, at least that's what he MEANS. Ryan is dancing with a random dude in the audience. It is too dark on the stage, and it doesn't really help the "I'm watching you from the bushes" face that he makes. Randy actually liked it, and the decibel level jumps. Ellen jumps in with another analogy- this time comparing him to tequila... the more she drinks it, the more she likes it. Simon liked it. Apparently the guy Ryan danced with was Michael Sarver, last season's "regular guy."

Lee Dewyze is jazzing up "A Little Less Conversation," and Adam tells him that his face is part of the performance, so maybe he should. His raspy voice goes a little better with the idea behind the song, which, in case you didn't know, is "shut your mouth and let's get busy." Randy geeks out. Ellen loves that it is more current, and reinforces that his confidence is what helps his performance. Kara loved the vocal- but wanted him to be a little more playful. Simon laughs at it and asks if she wants him to bounce around the stage. Simon loved it, and seems to be the only one that remembered that we are on limited time tonight. GLEE in less than an hour.

Aaron Kelly is singing "Blue Suede Shoes," because it is the probably the oldest type song he could pick, so at 16- naturally it would be the best fit. Adam tells him to get aggressive and grab his balls. Aaron realizes it's a bad choice, but could give a shit. Ugh. It seems very karaoke. Popped collar, bopping head, swaying hips... is he trying out for Grease? He then slows it down to a lounge act. Randy asks why it isn't the right song.. and his answer was "the drinking part." Randy liked the second half. Ellen thought it was a big song to take on, so it was an A for effort. Kara liked it because he was out of his comfort zone, and more current. The crowd seems shocked. Simon, of course, agrees with me. Old fashioned, karaoke, and a high school concert. He also said "frusss trAAY- ting" We are on the same level tonight.

It is so nice to be able to have two performances before a commercial. :)

Awkward Stool Time with Siobhan, and she has Elvis hair too. I hope that Adam tells her to stop trying to be him. "Suspicious Minds," is her song of choice- and he is sleepy, so he tells her to up the tempo. He says it is a "compliment" that people are comparing her to him. I wonder how many times he had to practice that to make it sound genuine. Her outfit looks like the one that Terry wears when she is a girl again in "Just One of The Guys." Damn you, google images for not providing me with a picture. And it is so 80's pop. Turrrrible. And the parents with her face on their shirt. Randy blah blah blah. Ellen thinks she looks fabulous, and liked the second half better, where she yelled like a banshee. Kara says she is confused by the two voices, and isn't crazy about it. Simon thinks it was erratic and not one of her best. Ryan wants to know what she should do next week. He says pick something that is more her. She says she doesn't know who she is, and that's ok, because who needs labels. Yup- and everyone gets a trophy, and everyone is special. Ugh.

Michael ins singing "In the Ghetto," which Siobhan recommended, because, you know, he's black. He slows it down and sings it on the chair with the guitar, because the ladies love it that way. Judges are kept to one sentence, because they realized that they wasted their chat time on the others. And they know they need it for Katie.

She is singing ".Baby Whatcha Want Me To Do?" because she wants to bring in the emotion of not knowing what the judges want into a song. Adam tells her that means she needs to rough it up, and you know, perform it. WHAT IS THAT OUTFIT. She is yelling into the mic half the time, and it is rough. Lights bonanza! Another tshirt family. Randy was "entertained," and seems surprised that it should be happening at this stage in the competition. Ellen said it was horny. Because there were a lot of horns. Kara got sassy. And Simon said it was annoying. But it doesn't matter what he thinks. When I look at her, I think of a comment from Showgirls. It is when the casting director is critiquing the girls, and he says to one (paraphrasing) "come back when you've screwed off the baby fat. " That's kinda how I feel about her.


Casey is singing some song about misery. Adam tells him to make it more interesting, and he's like, "yeah, totally." Apparently "Cloudy, Miss Cloudy" is the song. His hair is pulled back, and his back up singers are on the stairs. It is weird. Ryan is really hanging out in the audience, and it is kind of creepy uncle with all the touching. Solid performance, blah blah. Ellen says it wasn't as exciting as she has seen.... Kara was bored. Simon called it a wasted opportunity. So, the show is ending on a downer...

Man- the bitches at Glee made sure this show ended when it was supposed to. Sorry Idol, you aren't the top dawg anymore. Don't mess with Glee fans, we've been waiting 4 months.

Who cares who goes home tomorrow? Fingers crossed for Siobhan and Aaron. Remember, there are supposed to be two. ;)

I'm not going to crazy spell check- because GLEE is on.