With my frequent tweeting about the Green Bay Packers, I increased my male following. Sweet! So, in order to provide them with some more value, I decided to give them some help in the relationship world. Not the mushy stuff. The "be the good boyfriend and make it look easy" way. So this Valentine weekend, if your girl asks you to go see the movie "Valentine's Day," here's what you need to know....
This follows the movie style of super star cast ensemble as seen in "Love Actually" and "He's Just Not That Into You." So, bonus for you- lots of hot chicks.
Here is what you need to know about the chicks:
-within the first ten minutes, you will get brief ass glimpses from Jennifer Garner AND Anne Hathaway. If Anne has never "done it" for ya, take a look at her new GQ photo spread. You might change your mind. Also, spoiler alert: her character is a part-time phone sex girl.
-you get TWO Jessica's... Biel and Alba. But, I have to be honest. Alba has about 11 minutes of screen time, and Biel is too skinny.
- Both Shirley Maclaine and Kathy Bates keep their clothes on.
- Julia Roberts keeps her wide mouth horse laugh to herself.
Here's what you need to know about the plot:
-Many of the characters are inter-connected. Story lines overlap. It's nothing too complicated, but it helps to pay attention.
-Most of it is completely predictable. Especially if you have turned on a TV in the last week, and seen a commercial.
- The first 45 minutes are actually pretty funny, and move pretty quickly.... then... it gets mushy and a little depressing for about 35 minutes. Of course the last half hour wraps everything up in a pretty bow.
- There will be moments when there is an audible "awwwww" from every girl in the theater. Take this opportunity to squeeze your girl's hand. You will get bonus points.
-There is a pretty equal ratio of "guys are cheaters" to "girls suck." Well, at least more balanced than most chick flicks.
Moral of the story: there are way worse chick flicks you could see. At least this one has plenty of funny moments, and isn't ridiculously sappy. It would probably be a better bet that "Dear John." Take the bonus points right now, and buck up and see it.
And no---- I didn't make my boyfriend go. He bitches too much to make it worth dragging him. I don't recommend that route. ;)
For the record- no one paid me to blog about this movie. Just trying to help a brother out.
5 weeks ago